๐”– Bobbio Scriptorium
โœฆ   LIBER   โœฆ

Cover of Pride and Prejudice and Vampires

Pride and Prejudice and Vampires

โœ Scribed by PJ Jones


Book ID
110930903
Publisher
Shifting Sands Publishing
Year
2016
Tongue
English
Weight
199 KB
Category
Fiction
ISBN-13
9781533737694
ASIN
B009M7G7HC

No coin nor oath required. For personal study only.

โœฆ Synopsis


PJ Jones doesn't just take fiction and make it funny. First she bludgeons it, butchers it, pulverizes it, and then regurgitates the indigestible parts onto the page. So if you are bold enough to click on that purchase button, just be warned; if your laugh-o-meter is set to prude, not crude, and you have high literary standards, or ANY standards at all, you will be sadly disappointed, plus you may vomit a little in your mouth.
If you are ready to take a jaunt through low-brow inane prose, join Elizabeth Bennet and her vampire family as they disgrace a once-esteemed novel while feasting on toad-faced suitors, servants and orphans. Mmmmm.
Thank goodness for Mr. Darcy, who tries to steer Elizabeth back on script, and preserve whatever dignity is left of Jane Austen's good name, while at the same time, salivating over Elizabeth Bennet's huge breasts.
Included in this shameless satire is more rip-snortin' good fun, a collection of eight short paranormal parodies: The Guide to Immortal Sex; The PMS Vampire, Werewolf and Zombie Handbook; Melvin the Vacuum Salesman Zombie; and a few other nameless, tasteless short stories.
What are you waiting for? Either buy the book or get out now before you suffer permanent brain damage.
*** Praise for Pride and Prejudice and Vampires ***
From Jane Austen: This book motivated me to return from beyond the veil of mortality so that I might smack PJ Jones upside the head.
From PJ Jones's neighbor's dead cat: I can't believe I wasted one of my nine lives reading this book.
From Melvin the zombie: Brains. Books. Brains.
From the flasher in the Safeway parking lot: Come a little closer. I've got something else for you to read.
From the sanitation truck driver in PJ's neighborhood: I knew there was a strange smell coming from PJ's house.


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