Title Page; Copyright Page; Dedication; A Rash Series of Decisions; A Supposed Source of Helpful Advice; Forced Exodus; Accused of Perversion; Petty Crime Committed; A Home Away from Home; Poked Viciously by Crazy Person; Heavy Breathing; Initiates Clandestine Purchase; Evil Twin; An Increasingly Crowded Orgy; Breakfast and Shoplifting; Unwanted Confession; Regrettable Attempt at Second Breakfast; The Least Flattering Reflection; Bullshit for Breakfast; Hateful People Are Hateful; The World's Deadliest Crumb Catcher; A Personal Reckoning; Red-Handed; The Harshest of Hangover Cures.;"Enchanted by Good For Nothing ..."--Stephen Fry "This book could be the lovechild of Bill Bryson and Martin Amis ... But at its heart is a very serious point. It is about the tsunami of destruction that has hit Middle America since the financial crisis."--Daily Mail Flip Mellis believes his recent past would be best described as: a man with his feet planted on terra firma. As a husband and father, he was a consistent breadwinner. As a business professional, he was a go-getter. For twenty years, he did all that was expected of him, if not much more. But a job loss in his middle years, in the midst of a national economic crisis, has knocked Flip squarely on his big, soft ass, where he has been wallowing for nearly a year. Over the course of one hectic week, replete with a cast of colorful characters, Flip is forced by circumstances of his own invention to finally get his life headed in the right direction. Like a pudgy, irritable toddler, he carefully tests his balance and lurches forward, stumbling around absurd obstacles and grasping for any solid purchase. Ultimately a spark of human resilience locked deep within his core begins to spread. The question becomes: will Flip's best efforts be enough to lead him safely to redemption or will they merely lead to a futile, purely graceless, and quixotic crash?