Title Page
Copyright Page
Table of Contents
Introduction
About This Book
Foolish Assumptions
Icons Used In This Book
Beyond the Book
Where to Go from Here
Part 1 You’re Going to Be a Dad (Yes, You)
Chapter 1 Welcome to Dad Land
The Glorious, Frightening, Mind-Boggling World of Fatherhood
A father? Who, me?
Reacting to a life-changing event
Dealing with fatherhood fears
Debunking six common myths
Becoming a Modern Dad
Changes in your personal life
Changes in your professional life
Lifestyle changes to consider
Bringing baby into a turbulent world
Deciding to Take the Plunge (or Not)
Determining whether you’re ready
Telling your partner you’re ready
Telling your partner you’re not ready
Being patient when one of you is ready (and the other isn’t)
Dealing with an unexpected pregnancy
Welcoming long-awaited pregnancies
Peering into the Pregnancy Crystal Ball
First trimester
Second trimester
Third trimester
Chapter 2 Your Conception Primer
Sperm, Meet Egg: Baby Making 101
Producing a mature egg
Sending in some good sperm
Making the journey and attaching to the uterus
Answering FAQs about getting pregnant
Tracking the Journey: Using Fertility Apps and Monitors
Evaluating Health to Get Ready for Parenthood
Discovering female health issues that affect conception
Recognizing issues that cause fertility problems in men
Assessing lifestyle choices that affect eggs and sperm
Keeping Sex from Becoming a Chore
Choosing the best time for conception
Scheduling sex: The do’s and don’ts
Taking a Brief yet Important Look at Infertility
Knowing the facts about infertility
Checking on potential problems when nothing’s happening
Working through it when your partner needs treatment
Exploring solutions when your sperm don’t stack up
Examining new developments in infertility treatments
Deciding how far to go to get pregnant
Sharing Your Decision to Have a Baby
Considering the pros and cons of spilling the beans
Handling unsolicited advice about reproduction
Chapter 3 Non-Traditional Dadhood
Becoming a Two Dad or Dad Alone Family
Who’s supplying the egg? The sperm? The womb?
Looking at the legalities of surrogacy
Involving a family member in egg donation or carrying the baby
Finding a friend who’s willing to donate or carry
Working with an agency
Drawing up a contract
Deciding how involved you’ll be in the pregnancy
Becoming comfortable with a stranger
Maintaining boundaries with a friend or family member
Being Involved When You’re Not Able to Be Around
Keeping up to date when you’re out of town — or country
Dealing with the frustrations of long-distance pregnancy
Part 2 The Final Countdown: Nine Months (or Less!) to Baby
Chapter 4 Balancing Joy, Anxiety, and Nausea: The First Trimester
Baby on Board: It’s Official!
Reacting when your partner breaks the news
Making the announcement to friends and family
Overcoming your fears of being a father
Early Prenatal Care: Kicking Off a Nine-Month-Long Relationship
Finding a medical practitioner who works for both of you
Attending the first (and longest) prenatal visit
Going to the first ultrasound
Baby’s Development during the First Trimester
He may not look like much now, but . . .
Amazing changes in weeks 7 to 12
Dealing with Possible Complications in the First Trimester
Miscarrying in early pregnancy
Understanding ectopic pregnancy
Coping with pregnancy loss
Reducing Early Developmental Risks
Smoking and development problems
Drinking during pregnancy
OTC and prescription drugs and their health risks
Autism spectrum risks and prevention
Common First Trimester Discomforts — Yours and Hers
Helping your partner cope with early symptoms
Getting used to strange new maternal habits
Taking on your emerging support role
Chapter 5 Growing into the Second Trimester
Tracking Baby’s Development during the Second Trimester
Growing and changing in months four and five
Refining touches in the sixth month
Checking Out Mom’s Development in the Second Trimester
Gaining weight the right way
Looking pregnant at last!
Testing in the Second Trimester
Preparing for the possible risks of tests and ultrasounds
Understanding blood tests and amniocentesis
Following up on the test results
Scrutinizing ultrasounds
Having Sex in the Second Trimester
Maintaining a healthy sex life during pregnancy
Addressing common myths and concerns
Exploring Different Options for Childbirth Classes
Dealing with Insurance (or a Lack Thereof)
Understanding your insurance
Having a baby without insurance
Chapter 6 Nesting, Registering, and Naming (Oh My!)
A Guy’s Guide to “Nesting”
Making the house spotless — and then some
Engaging in Instagram preparedness
Setting up the nursery
Arranging the nursery for two or more
Baby-proofing 101
Understanding the Art of the Baby Registry
Doing your homework ahead of time to get what you want
Finding out what you need — and what you think you won’t need but can’t live without!
Navigating the online-versus-local- registry decision
Checking out five things you don’t have to have and will never adore
Celebrating the Wee One’s Impending Arrival: Baby Shower Basics
Opting into — or out of — gender reveal parties
Throwing virtual parties
Naming Your Baby
Narrowing down your long list
Reconciling father/mother differences of opinion
Discussing choices with friends and family
Chapter 7 Preparing for What Could — But Probably Won’t — Go Wrong
Managing Pregnancy-Related Medical Issues
Hypertensive conditions in pregnancy
Gestational diabetes
Pregnancy in women with previously diagnosed diabetes
Placenta previa
Mandatory bed rest
Handling Abnormal Ultrasounds
Birth defects
Fetal demise
Preparing Yourself for Preterm Labor and Delivery
Recognizing the risks of preterm delivery
Handling feelings of guilt
Navigating the NICU
Knowing what to expect with a preemie
Clarifying common problems
Learning the ropes — er, wires
Preparing for preemie setbacks
Taking baby home
Hi, Baby Baby Baby: Having Multiples
Multiple identities: What multiples are and who has them
Health risks for mom
Risks for the babies
Keeping Cool in Monetary Emergencies
Checking out your insurance limits
Covering the cost of unexpected medical expenses
Chapter 8 Nearing the Finish Line: The Third Trimester
Tracking Baby’s Development during the Third Trimester
Adding pounds and maturing in the seventh and eighth months
Getting everything in place in the ninth month
Finding Out What Mom Goes Through in the Third Trimester
Understanding your partner’s physical changes
Heeding warning signs
Bracing for your partner’s emotional changes
Sympathizing with her desire to have this over, already
Dealing with tears, panic, and doubts . . . even your own
Guaranteeing a Smooth Admissions Process
Picking a Pediatrician
Whose Baby Is This, Anyway? Dealing with Overbearing Family Members
Chapter 9 The Copilot’s Guide to Birthing Options
Choosing Where to Deliver
Delivering at a hospital
Delivering at home with a midwife
Delivering at a birthing center
Making Sure Your Birth Practitioner Is a Good Fit
Screening potential practitioners
Working with a midwife
Getting some additional help with a doula
Looking at Labor Choices
Going all natural or getting the epidural
Taking it to the water
Creating a Birth Plan
Visualizing your ideal experience
Drafting your plan
Sharing your birth plan with the world
Picking the Cast: Who’s Present, Who Visits, and Who Gets a Call
Deciding who gets to attend the birth
Planning ahead for visitors
Spreading the news
Part 3 Whoa, Baby! Labor, Delivery, and the First Days at Home
Chapter 10 Wowing the Maternity Floor: How to Be the Best Labor and Delivery Partner
When It’s Time, It’s Time — Is It Time?
Avoiding numerous dry runs (yes, it’s us again)
Knowing when it’s too late to head out
Supporting Your Partner During Labor
Figuring out what she needs from you
Not taking the insults seriously
Looking at What Happens During and After Labor
First stage
Second stage
Wrapping things up after the birth
Helping baby right after delivery
Walking Through Common Labor Procedures
Vaginal exams
IVs
Membrane ruptures
Fetal monitoring
Coping with Labor Pain
Enduring it: Going unmedicated
Dulling it: Sedation (no, not for you)
Blocking it out: Epidurals
Deviating from Your Birth Plan/Vision
Having a Cesarean
Scheduled C-section
Unplanned Cesarean delivery
What to expect before the operation
What to expect during the surgery
Getting past disappointment
Chapter 11 Caring for Your Newborn
Getting Your First Look at a Typical Newborn
Examining your newborn
Rating the reflexes
Feeding a Newborn
Breast-feeding basics
Getting started
Supplemental bottles
Pumping
Bottle-feeding basics
Changing Diapers
Cleaning baby boys
Cleaning baby girls
Bathing Your Squirming Bundle of Joy
Holding Your Baby
Co-sleeping Pros and Cons
Back to Sleep: Helping Baby Sleep Safely and Comfortably
Coping if baby hates being on his back
Swaddling your little one
Preventing the flat-head look
Soothing Baby Indigestion
Colic
Gas
Reflux
Scheduling Immunizations
Skipping some shots?
Spreading them out
Taking a stand on the vaccination debate
Chapter 12 Supporting the New Mom . . . and Surviving Yourself!
Handling Housework during the Recovery Phase
Getting the house in order
Taking care of meals
Calling in backup
Supporting a Breast-Feeding Mom
Making the decision to breast-feed
Offering lactation support
Including yourself in the process
Dealing with Post-Cesarean Issues
Helping with a normal recovery
Knowing when to call the doctor
Riding the Ups and Downs of Hormones
Thinking before speaking in the sensitive postpartum period
Shedding light on physical symptoms
Getting through the “baby blues”
Sleeping (or Doing Without)
Coping with Company
Dealing with grabby grandmas
Managing unsolicited advice
Handling hurt feelings when you want to be alone
Rediscovering the Physical and Romantic
Prioritizing love and romance
Waiting at least six weeks for sex
Understanding changes in body and libido
Learning to be patient and give grace
When to seek help
Part 4 Under Pressure: How to Worry the Right Way about the Big Stuff
Chapter 13 Dealing with Difficult Issues after Delivery
Coping with Baby’s Serious Health Problems
Congenital defects
Developmental delays
Illnesses
SIDS
Watching Out for Mom’s Postpartum Mood Disorders
Taking a look at postpartum depression
Recognizing the symptoms
Knowing who’s more at risk
Treating the disease
Taking care of yourself
Acting fast to treat postpartum psychosis
Managing Grief
Going through the stages of grief
Why, why, why? Getting past the question
Grieving together and separately
Determining when grief has gone on too long
Talking to People about Your Child
Telling others
Handling insensitive remarks
Chapter 14 Survival Tips for Bumps, Boo-Boos, and More
Handling Inevitable Illnesses
Dealing with common childhood diseases
Staying alert for scarier diseases
Meningitis
Diarrhea
Protecting Baby from Common Accidents — and Handling Them When They Happen Anyway
Taking care of baby after a fall
Staying safe in the car
Managing Medical Crises at Home
Don’t panic! Don’t panic!
Calling the doctor
Open Wide, Baby! Administering Medicine
Taking a Baby’s Temperature
Choosing a thermometer
Taking a rectal temperature
Recognizing fevers
Deciphering Diaper Contents
Knowing what’s normal
Checking out color changes
Teething Symptoms and Remedies
Reacting to Medicines and Vaccines
Medications that cause reactions
Vaccination reactions — yours and your baby’s
Dealing with Food Allergies
Introducing new foods
Recognizing allergic reactions
Preventing allergic reactions
Chapter 15 Fun, Freedom, and Finances: The Cost of Having a Baby
Creating a Family/Fun/Work Balance with Baby
Taking time off with paternity leave
Looking at possible time-off options
Discussing your leave options
Getting all your paperwork in order
Managing sick time when you’re back at work
Dealing with after-work expectations
Working from home tips to stay productive
Reprioritizing your commitments
Readjusting When — or if — Mom Goes Back to Work
Making going back to work easier on mom
Deciding to be a stay-at-home mom
Helping mom adjust if she doesn’t go back to work
Becoming a stay-at-home dad
Exploring the Expected (And Unexpected) Costs of Baby
Deciding what baby really needs
Bracing yourself for the costs of must-have baby supplies
Comparing childcare options and costs
Managing Your Money
Prioritizing your needs
Determining where to cut costs
Chapter 16 Ensuring a Bright Future for Your New Family
Planning for a Financially Sound Future
Prioritize your expenses
Create (and stick to) a budget
Pay down your debt
Create an emergency fund
Buy disability insurance
Contribute to a retirement account
Work with a financial advisor
Mind your credit score
Saving Money for Your Child’s Future
Getting the Lowdown on Life Insurance
Obtaining adequate life insurance for mom and dad
Considering a policy for your baby
Whole-life coverage versus term
How much coverage is enough?
Health Insurance Options for Newborns
Adding baby to an existing work-paid plan
Buying coverage just for baby
Obtaining free and low-cost care for uninsured kids
Taking Care of Legal Matters
Creating a will
Establishing power of attorney
Growing together as a couple
Learning how to be parents on the same team
Investing in your mental well-being
Part 5 The Part of Tens
Chapter 17 Ten Must-Do’s to Compensate for Not Having to Give Birth
Say Nice Things
Start a Baby Book
Make Exercise Fun
Listen . . . Don’t Try to Fix It
Attend Prenatal Appointments
Book a Mini-Vacation (Babymoon)
Register for a Prenatal Class
Get Smart about Baby
Master Prenatal Massage
Keep the House Neat and Tidy
Chapter 18 Ten Ways to Bond as a New Family
Don’t Be Afraid . . . Be Awesome
Trust Your Instincts
Spend Time Skin-to-Skin, Eye-to-Eye
Check Frustrations
Embrace Your Goofy Side
Steal Away for a Date Early On
Teach Baby New Tricks
Roughhouse the Safe Way
Read Daily
Say Goodbye to Mommy
Index
EULA