β Scribed by Salma Mohsin
No coin nor oath required. For personal study only.
H er name was Mrs. Carberry, but her readers knew her as Mary Margaret. Two months earlier, she suffered a debilitating stroke that took away her vibrant life. Previously a prolific writer of advice columns and opinion pieces, the blockage of blood to her brain dammed the steady flow of wisdom to her innumerable fans. They never again would benefit from the words of this intelligent, feisty, and self-proclaimed ''Cranky Catholic''. Unfortunately, I would not know Mary Margaret for her words, but only her numbers: her vital signs, her urine output, her tube feed residuals.
Not able to communicate with us, we wondered . . . did Mrs. Carberry want this tracheostomy that was placed? Did she want this peg tube that fed her continuously? And even if she would have initially agreed to them, would she still want them now? Especially given she was not improving and had little hope for a meaningful recovery.
We posed these difficult questions to her two sons. One son believed that his mother would want an end to these aggressive measures. The other son disagreed; he said his mother would want to make every effort to stay alive.
In the end, Mary Margaret's voice found its way to us and provided us with the answer. She did not tell us in the conventional manner via a lawyer or a living will. Her friends did not come forth and let us know about serious conversations during their afternoon lunches. Instead, Mary Margaret penned it to her audience of devoted readers in a newspaper column written 14 years earlier. Mary Margaret's poignant words were revealed to her doctors by her son who understood its undeniable significance.
Mary Margaret was an essayist in Chicago whose pieces filled many major newspapers and magazines. She had strong opinions on matters large and small, writing articles addressing topics ranging from her Catholic beliefs to gender-based inequities in the workplace. One article in particular addressed sickness and death and provided her sons the answer they sought. Having witnessed illness strike two loved ones, it was only natural for Mary Margaret to write about it. Her very personal essay was entitled ''Tough Questions on Life, Death and a Dog Named 'Bamboo' .'' The words, resurfacing years later, and now having direct meaning to her own life and death, may have been some of the most profound and prophetic words of her career:
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